My Mail-Order Husband

Here’s how it works.  You travel Central America for a few months, grow weary of street vendor come-ons and a hostel bunk bed for one, then in a fit of desperation you send off the email.  Come here, now.  And he does.

Who knew all I had to do was ask?

It took some finagling.  He had been helping his dad with with the house in Vermont.  They didn’t sell it.  But they did find a family to rent it.  The dogs?  Well, in order to travel on short notice, and to have the flexibility we needed, they are staying with the in-laws until July.  And my husband?  After far too long apart, he has finally joined me in Costa Rica.

Just like ordering a husband online, except less expensive and he doesn’t need a green card.  Oh and we’ve already been married for five years.  How sweet is that?

So I’ve gotten to share some of my favorite parts of Costa Rica and he’s gotten to work on his surfing.

Besides the obvious benefits of having my spouse with me (like how awesome it is, verses say, not), there are some things I’d either forgotten or didn’t know.

It’s much cheaper to travel as two, if you calculate the per person cost.  For the same price as two dorm beds, we get a private room.  When you grocery shop for two, the prices for staples (like oil, salt, pepper, spices etc) get split too.  Even when we take a shuttle, the price is lower (in some cases) than if I traveled alone.

Traveling with someone is completely different than traveling alone.  And that’s not always a good thing.  When it’s just me, I have many more adventures (read: get myself into trouble).  I also tend to meet more people.  I don’t know if we put out the “we’re a couple leave us alone” vibe, but it’s been a lot less social.  We still meet people, but if anyone is afraid traveling alone is lonely, I actually find it to be about 10X more social.

I tend to want to travel even slower. I have no idea why this is, but I’m more likely to stay in a place with my husband than if I traveled alone.  Perhaps it’s because it’s less boring.  If nothing’s happening, I’m perfectly content sitting on the beach and reading a book for a few days, if I have good company.  Which, I now do.

I speak Spanish less. This is due to two things.  First, my husband doesn’t speak it very well, so when someone comes and chats us up in Spanish, he’s left clueless for the next hour.  I try to translate as we go, but it doesn’t always work well.  The other thing is that I want him to learn!  So if we’re speaking Spanish to get directions or a reservation, I’ll sit back and let him work it out.  I could jump in and handle it, but he’ll never learn that way.

I eat more. I had forgotten this!  Three meals a day.  Right.  Not coffee, snack, fruit, something from a street vendor.  Those aren’t meals, after all.  When you’re traveling solo, what’s the point of making a big meal?  And now that he’s back, all I do is cook!  Who’s making guacamole from scratch in the kitchen?  Me.  Who is cooking enough pasta to choke a horse?  Me.  Who’s made a traditional Tico breakfast, including fried plaintains?  Sorry, my man’s gotta eat!

I remember why I do all this. I love traveling, but I really love sharing it with someone.  I’d been trying to describe my life here, but as soon as he came, he was amazed.  He loves it.  I’m like, yeah, I know.

It’s been a good week.