In 2008, I quit my corporate job, sold off everything I owned and moved overseas with my husband Drew. Since then we've traveled around the world, started our careers over as creative types and nurtured our love of sleeping in late. Oh and we had a baby. Cole, our almost 2 year old has been traveling since he was four months old and probably knows more Thai than me (not that he brags).
What You Learn When You Travel Solo
Today’s guest post is by Matt Kepnes, from NomadicMatt.com.
People often ask me why I travel alone. They either assume I am too weird to have friends or am just anti-social. But that’s not why I travel alone. I travel alone because of the freedom it gives me. When you travel with a large group of people there are a lot of competing desires and needs that need to be taken into account. When you travel alone, there is only yours. Want to go somewhere? Go! Feel like eating Italian for dinner? Eat Italian. Sleep in if you want. You can do whatever.
Some may say this is selfish but what traveling solo really does is help you figure out what makes you you and what you really like or dislike. Forced to fend for yourself, it is do or die. You have to adapt to your surroundings, meet other people, make your own decisions, and plan your life.
The Buddha once said that the greatest warriors are not those who have mastered others but those who have mastered themselves. So often in our hectic world we don’t have time for ourselves. We get lost in working, commuting, errands, events, and expectations. We rarely examine the inside. Not because we don’t want to but because we can never find the time.
Going out on the road, we are forced to examine all aspects of ourselves- the good and the bad. When I came home after eighteen months away, everyone asked me the same question- “Are you different?” I don’t know. Traveling changes you but slowly, minutely. It’s not one big mind altering event but a polishing of the edges of your personality. So of course I am different. I can already see many of the changes. But many these were incremental changes I never even noticed- and still haven’t.
But having survived life on the road by myself, I gained one thing we all want- self-confidence. If I can navigate foreign countries by pointing, walk up to random strangers and walk away with friends, learn new languages, learn new skills and survive, I can do anything. You realize how capable you really are when you go at it alone.
Years around the world might not be for everyone but everyone should go away and travel solo, whether two weeks, two months, or two years. Just do it. There’s nothing to be scared about. Millions have already done it. There’s nothing better than learning about yourself.
And the worry that traveling solo means traveling alone? A fallacy. I am never alone unless I want to be. With just you, you have two choices: stay alone or make friends. You force yourself to be more friendly and open to others because if you don’t, you’ll be traveling alone. So you talk the vendor at the market, you chat up the locals on the bus, and sit down with the group at the hostel. You make an effort you normally wouldn’t. And, you know what, it’s not that bad. At first, it took me awhile to get over it. I was always a bit shy. What if they don’t like me? But then you realize, you have nothing to lose and everything to gain.
On a beach in Thailand, I walked up to this group of people and asked to join in their soccer game. A year later, I was at a wedding for two of them. All because I just said “%^&* it!” and went and talked to them.
Don’t worry about going alone. You’ll make it. You’ll find new friends- I guarantee or your money back! And you’ll have the time of their life.
No one ever regrets traveling solo for a bit.
Matt Kepnes is a avid budget and solo traveler who has been spending over two years on the road. You can read his tips and advice at Nomadic Matt’s Travel Site or learn how to do it too at his new site, How to Travel the World.