A Brief Encounter with the Spanish Medical Establishment
14. Sep, 2008 
19 Comments
It’s been a strange weekend. My husband has contracted some mysterious virus, and I’ve been playing nurse and trying not to catch what the doctor called, “very contagious”. I will find out soon enough if I have it. It’s kind of like buying a lottery ticket and hoping your number doesn’t come up.
Let me back up. On Thursday, I was lugging the 900+ page tome Ulysses around Dublin, stopping occasionally to sink into plush oversized chairs in some cafe, and melting into the text for a few blissful hours. The key with Joyce is to relax your mind. It’s written mostly in stream of consciousness, and the effect is that you must inhabit the characters thoughts, to allow the quick impressions to wash over you. If you try to grab hold of any detail, you lose it, and the lighter your touch, the easier it is to hang onto the narrative.
At this point, my husband calls, and warns me that his “jaw is really swollen”. To be honest, I was groggy from reading and I didn’t think much of it. I just reassured him that it’s probably just a slight allergic reaction or swollen lymph nodes from an oncoming cold. He agreed. No big deal.
The next day I fly home to Madrid, and meet my husband in the street. As he approaches, I notice something different. My mouth drops open. My husband’s face is comically swollen, with a good 2 inches of bulging flesh on either side. He looks like a 500 lb man from the neck up. Oh My God. I touch the sides of his jaw, and there are hard golf ball sized lumps. I cringe. It’s hard not to internalize pain when your loved one is hurt. I feel icy pins in my body and suck in my breath. Baby, you are going to the hospital right now. I’m making a scene now–little old ladies are watching me. We are walking back to the house and you’re calling work and we are going. Are you on a deadline? Yes. Well too bad. They will have to deal. Is it really that bad? Honey, it’s horrible. I’m really nervous.
Later, we’re walking to the Clinica Universal, which is 2 blocks away. By now, my initial shock has worn off and we’re laughing because my husband is notoriously bad at medical self care. He avoids doctors like the plague. I wonder if that’s what he has. You’re never allowed to be alone! I know, he says. We laugh. I researched online before we left and feared it was lymphoma, a type of cancer. My husband doesn’t know this, but I’ve always been afraid something horrible like this would happen. Still we’re laughing. Bubonic plague has similar symptoms. Hahahaha.
At the clinic, we’re plunged into a Spanish only world, where we don’t have the vocabulary to express ourselves. Swollen, jaw, lymph nodes, health insurance and so on. We find out that this clinic is privado. 300 euros to see a doctor. We asked the receptionist for another place, un hospital, si? After an hour of bad directions and phantom hospitals (no one has heard of the Hospital Princessa that the receptionist mentioned) we find the emergency room in Moncloa. They take our insurance. I translate for Drew. Why have you come here today. When is your birth date? Did you eat something? Go wait and we will call your name. When it comes time for Drew to go in, they tell me no family members. He’s whisked away. I learn later that his doctor spoke perfect English, so it was fine. 20 minutes later he texts me:
MUMPS. VERY CONTAGIOUS.
What! Nobody gets mumps anymore. It’s like finding out you have Small Pox or Polo. They gave us a regiment of antibiotics and sent us home. I think he’s been misdiagnosed. My husband thinks this is hilarious.
It’s been 48 hours and the swelling is almost gone. He’s been resting, and watching bad movies (Rambo IV, Blade 3 and 88 minutes). And I’ve been cooking all of his favorite foods. Whatever mysterious virus this is, the antibiotics worked. But I’m still convinced it’s not mumps but more likely tonsillitis or some other infection. I’ve made a mental note to schedule an appointment with his GP when we get home in a week.
My husband thinks that my misdiagnosis theory is ruining a perfectly good story. How often can you site an obscure affliction during your travels? Either way, I suspect he’ll still get plenty of mileage out of the How I Got Mumps in Madrid story for years to come… and I’ll play my part, nodding, yes, he really did.
Mumps?!! Wow!
Glad the swelling is way down. Allergic reaction maybe? I’m with you though. Go see the doc once you guys are back in the states.
Lolas last blog post..Postcard: Worlds Collide
Ack! I am so glad the swelling has gone down… whatever it is.
I can totally relate to what you said about not having the Spanish vocabulary to talk about your health. I can negotiate so many situations in Spanish but when it’s a matter of my health – or that of my partner – the years of Spanish simply vanish from my brain.
The happy news is that the public Spanish medical system is quite good.
Wow indeed!
Monnas last blog post..To Blend or Not to Blend
oooh, I had mumps as a kid! (and no, i’m only 28…not 60 like most people that had mumps as a kid!) the antibotics worked really well, and within two days I was back in school. you’re right though, you should make an appointment with your GP too.
glad drew is feeling better!
He’s lucky, most childhood afflictions that manifest in adulthood are far more serious (and can sometimes affect different body parts than those in childhood too). Glad he’s feeling better – glad you got back in time to insist on the medical care plan.
This is kind of weird because it does sound like mumps, with the swollen parotid glands and all. But mumps is caused by a virus and can’t/shouldn’t be treated with an antibiotic. I find it kind of strange that the doctor diagnosed mumps yet gave antibiotics anyway. Either way, glad it’s getting better!
So sorry to hear about your husband getting ill. Glad that it sounds like he is getting better.
Not to freak you out… but Mumps is actually back. Because people aren’t getting their vaccinations updated, it’s started to make a bit of a comeback (along with Measles, Tetanus, etc.). So, it is entirely possible that he does actually have Mumps. But, with anitbiotics… should go away (sounds like it is).
Hope he finds some good movies to watch alongside the bad ones.
Loris last blog post..Ferry Around San Juan Islands
There’s an old wive’s tale that men who get mumps after puberty tend to have difficulty in the fertility department. I hope it’s not true! Either way, I got sick during my first week in Japan and with zero Japanese, it was really terrible!
Sandier Pasturess last blog post..Enjoying the last bit of vacation time
Here’s hoping you don’t catch whatever it is and that Drew is back to good in no time.
Theresas last blog post..Places that Fit and Places that Don’t
Get better soon, Drew!
And Christine– one day we’ll enjoy a cocktail or two over Francisco’s cut leg in Puerto Rico horror story.
Julies last blog post..The House of Memories: Mompox, Colombia
Yeah, this is true, I’ve also heard that mumps was back. I would trust the doctor. The Spanish health system is very good.
Hope he gets well soon and that you don’t get mumps too. Unless you want him to cook your favourite dishes as well.
Criss last blog post..Thoughts and feelings in Sydney
A good lesson for everyone who travels…find a place for medical care upon arrival. No one wants to have to hunt for a place when in pain or someone you love is in pain.
Chad @ Sentient Moneys last blog post..Banks Failing…Good News?
Wow scary Christine!! Good thing you’re coming back home soon. Though really European docs (and meds) are very good!
On the brightside, you have a great story and Drew found a way for you to cook all his favorite food.
plua, blade 3 is a bit better than blade 2….
Nomadic Matts last blog post..The Top Ten Travel Songs
Christine, I have been following your blog for awhile now…And, i really enjoy following your blog. And, I wish and hope that I am taking that big steps that you are doing now. Which to go backpacking around the world…Sigh!!! Still saving…Hopefully…Soon…Real Soon……
Anyway, so sorry to hear that your husband got sick and Hope he is ok by now!!
Best Regards
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Sorry to hear about Drew being sick, Christine! Must have been scary for a while there. Glad to hear you were able to laugh through it, and that he’s feeling better.
It’s funny, I always thought of mumps as wildly old-fashioned, too – until my uni in England had a massive outbreak and something like 40+ kids were quarantined/sent home.
Evas last blog post..Ray Charles – I Got A Woman
Mumps!! Really?!! I have never known someone to get the mumps. I know this isn’t a normal reaction – but forgive the med student. I kind of want to see it! Is that strange?
Yes, mumps is not uncommon. And while not life threatening, it could lead to sterility in an adult male. Not trying to scare you, just letting you know the diagnosis wasn’t as far-fetched as you first thought it was.
In general, the Spanish health care system is very good. And much better to go to the public hospitals rather than the private ones. They are much better equipped and also have better trained staff.
Best wishes for a speedy recovery!
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