Welcome to Paris: Kiss Me, It’s the Rule
15. Jul, 2008 
15 Comments
This afternoon I took a nap on the lawn in front of the Eiffel Tower. I had been walking all morning and finally sun burnt and exhausted (and unwilling to take the 40 minute train to my hotel) I collapsed beneath a tree with kissing 20-year-olds lounging on the grass around me. There is something about this city that makes the men go wild for women. When I awoke, a man carrying a guitar approached me speaking in French. “I speak English, sorry.” He didn’t relent. “French? Italian? Spanish?” At the last one I nodded, “Sí, Español”. He had his in.
He plopped down next to me, and we tried to talk in a combination of French, Spanish and English. I got out “married” in Spanish and he seemed to understand. I pointed to my wedding ring, he nodded. He said he was married too, and pointed to his ring finger, which was bare. I rolled my eyes and said, “no ring”. He shrugged. These are not the things we worry about in Paris.
He wanted to know if my blue eyes were natural. They were. He thought I was beautiful. Thanks. I wondered if I was going to have to actually get up and walk away before he would get the hint. “Béseme” he said, pointing to his lips. He wanted me to kiss him. I laughed and played dumb. “Oh you Americans, don’t you know it is okay in Paris?” I was trying to remember where in the guidebook it said it was a cultural norm to kiss strangers on the lips. I must have missed the chapter on “Why American Girls Will Fall for Whatever a French Guy Says”. No kiss, no luck. Once he realized that I wasn’t going to bite, he slung his guitar over his shoulder and took off– no doubt looking for more slightly groggy Americans to ply with his charms.
This hasn’t been an isolated event in my brief stay in the City of Love. Valentino followed me five blocks until I ditched him at the train station, promising to meet him the next morning for coffee at the same metro stop. (a big lie, oops). He had seen me in the park and had jogged up to catch me, telling me in broken English that I am “so beautiful and wow, it was amazing.”
I am not the kind of woman these things happen to. Trust me when I say, it’s Paris, not me.
Although, I do have to cut Paris a little slack. I don’t often travel to foreign countries alone. My husband and I have been together since I was 23 and all of our travels have been in tandem. So perhaps, solo female travelers in any city will be approached more often. They seem more accessible yet mysterious. Plus, they think the accent is cute, when French women just see a guy with a guitar and no job.
Still I have to wonder, for the men to be so persistent, they must be having some luck. So, how many American women do you think are kissing strange men beneath the Eiffel Tower?
Photo: Christine Gilbert
As a solo traveler, I did get hit on occasionally. I don’t think it is that uncommon… so, as you said, they must be successful some of the time. Now I’m married and travel with my husband, so don’t have it happen it to me anymore.
I usually found a good solid no worked pretty well. If it didn’t, I just walked away.
C’est La Vie!
BTW, that picture is gorgeous!
Loris last blog post..SF Gate – Hotel Avante
Paris is the world capital of random men approaching foreign women. They know not to go for the French women who were born with the natural ability to fend them off with one look. I’ve traveled solo in Vienna and Bratislava and I never got the attention I do in Paris!
Tanyas last blog post..Oh La La
Classic Paris! And to think there are actually girls that fall for it!
Lolas last blog post..Summer Postcards from Stockholm
I’m sure there are more women than we’d imagine falling for it. And I’m sure most of them could see it for what it is but choose not to. What’s more romantic than a love affair in Paris?
I find that the Southern European countries are the worst in this regard…Italy, Spain, Greece. I can’t even count the number of marriage proposals from I received from strangers while I lived in Greece. It almost became a daily occurrence. (And I always found that the blue eyes were the big attraction, so expect go get a bit more of that when you travel solo.)
And can I just say that a nap in front of the Eiffel Tower sounds luxurious?
Theresas last blog post..On My Way to Unemployment
These things never happen to me. Well, they do, but there’s usually a price (or an invitation to a brothel) attached.
@steve: that’s the same for me in thailand!
Christine, I bet lots of americans are wooed by the french….
Nomadic Matts last blog post..Ye Olde London
Tanya, I need to learn that look. Is it completely American of me not to want to be mean?
Theresa, I suspect you’re right about the blue eyes. Even in the states, I sometimes get comments, but even more so here.
Thats why i need to move to europe!!! lol
bonjour!
i’m so happy to come across your blog! actually, i’m in paris at the moment as well, and recently visited the eiffel tower with a friend when we were tired of walking around and sightseeing (like you) to rest on the lawn. we grabbed a couple of ice cream cones and sat down. immediately, a group of 3 young frenchmen who had been sitting nearby began talking to us and inviting us over to sit with them. we declined, and they persisted in telling us how beautiful we were, etc. no offers for smooches luckily, but i could definitely see it happening! haha!
=) malia
malias last blog post..you asked for it!
Christine- who hasn’t wanted to be wooed by a mysterious stranger underneath the Eiffel Tower?? I wonder if they go more for the married girls, knowing that sometimes we need a bit of excitement…
Either way, great story, you sound like you’re having so much fun! Maybe you can write the updated guidebook with the rules about kissing strange men.
I’m quite sure that there are many woman that do fall for the charm of the French. As a single woman, you’re bound to deal w/more male attention. I’ve experienced it quite a few times and pay it no mind. Sounds like a lovely trip.
sdg1844s last blog post..Happy, Happy, Joy Joy!
Strange culture “Kissing”
wouldnt mind if Tom Cruise is standing near Effil tower.
well, Paris is Paris. they will really say some honest things to you like what Pierre told you there but kissing him is a no-no and fortunately for you, you didn’t fall for the trap that Pepe Le Pew had prepared! But your vacation in Paris is worth it! That’s what I like about French people! they’re too honest!
Really cool blog. I found it on yahoo. I am looking forward to read more posts.
Can anybody tell me what